I was at a wedding shower recently and the topic turned to online dating. Everyone knows someone that has been burned by online dating. Here are five steps I have shared (from my own traumatic online dating experience);
1. Nothing on the web is real. Think about it. Nothing is guaranteed to be what it says it is. Don’t assume anything! Which leads to the next step…
2. Ask probing questions. Assume you know nothing. Ask about everything. Treat the date as an interview.
3. It’s all practice. Don’t be afraid of saying something silly. It’s just practice. Even if there is no spark, take the time to learn about the other person. It solidifies what you like and don’t like in a person.
4. Journal your experience. Write down what you learned about yourself and the potential date.
5. Don’t give away the farm. Don’t tell everything immediately. And if you get farther than the first date, don’t give away the farm. The more you respect yourself, the more you will be respected.
I would love to hear your online rules of dating!
Having done alot of online searching and dating; and even meeting people, some friends, some frogs and some not even in those categories; what I have found is that I treat ALL with respect. I have NO expectations; but more HOPE with a rare one…which has lead me to basically decide that UNLESS I see, hear or feel a SPARK…I won’t even meet them; no sense in wasting both of our times.
I let myself totally out and if they don’t respond in a way that seems reciprocal; well, that pretty says itall. The time is either cut off right there by either of us; all, OR..at best we have a great time, good conversation and a mutual acknowledgement that it will go no further is innately felt and we say goodbye on good terms at a high point with mutual respect.