“True love is made of four elements: loving kindness, compassion, joy, and equanimity.” –Thich Nant Hanh
When I married my husband Laurence, I knew he was living with polycythemia vera, a rare type of blood cancer. He was managing his symptoms with meds and regular doctor visits. We were convinced that love was more powerful than the disease and that we would not let his diagnosis interfere with our lives. Until it did…
We knew whatever time we had was precious. We never discussed it, but there was a sense of living in the present moment and not taking anything for granted. We had our share of quarrels and arguments but we resolved them quickly and made a pact to never go to bed angry. We appreciated every day and activity. I am so grateful for every moment we shared together. He may not be here physically, but I am so aware of his loving energy.
Lately I’ve been thinking about how precious life is. Everyday for everyone. Our time here on earth is so brief. What if we truly lived knowing our time is limited? What would life be like if we lived with an intention to love and treated each other with respect and appreciation? What if we let disagreements and differences fall away and found a sense of peace—for ourselves and others?
I lost several beloveds this year: my spiritual teacher and friend, Rev. Dr. Marcia Sutton; my beautiful friend, Georgena Grace: my wonderful Aunt Dorothy who took an interest in everything I did; my lovely friend Charlotte, and several other friends and family members. They left before I could tell them what an impact they had on my life and how much I appreciate them.
I live in an awareness of deep gratitude every day. My intention is to live as love to the best of my ability, and to forgive myself when I mess up. I intend to let others know they make a difference in my life. I choose to see love in everyone I meet.
When I need help remembering, I use this prayer from Paul Selig: “On this day I choose to know my worth in love. On this day I decide to know the worth of all in love, regardless of my previous perceptions of them. On this day I know that all are worthy of love, and my sight, my expression affirms this every moment of my waking day. I know that this is so.”
“In the short term and in the long run, how we treat people is our legacy. We have a daily responsibility to stay conscious of that and show up in ways we can be proud of.” – Sam Horn, Talking on Eggshells
It’s holiday time! That exciting time of year when we navigate the emotional terrain of spending time with loved ones. Anxiety, anyone?
Some loved ones are a joy to be with. Others can be more challenging.
Here are some helpful tips:
It’s not about them. We often have attachment as to how we would like our loved ones to behave. In fact WE have lots of ideas about how they can live better lives. Breathe and step back. Practice letting go.
Respond not react. Our loved ones know how to push our buttons. Disable your button. Disconnect from your high mindedness. Dissolve the need to have the answers. Practice responding peacefully and not reacting to situations.
Claim your intention. Instead of imagining all the terrible, awful, dreadful things that the holidays might bring, practice visualizing what you do want. What is your intention? To have loving communication? To have peaceful interactions? To have joy-filled experiences? Set your intention before you venture out the door.
Remember to breathe. Conscious breathing keeps us grounded in our awareness of our divinity and our oneness. Allow your breathing to center yourself in love. Pause and take a breath.
Practice gratitude. Gratitude lifts us up to a higher vibration. In that vibration of love, all things are possible.
I am grateful for my many blessings… I am grateful my family…I am grateful for my body and good health…I am grateful for my home…I bless my neighbors and my co-workers…I bless the economy…I bless our country…I bless my spiritual community…I bless the world.
I am so grateful for you. You are a blessing to the world.
“A single rose can be my garden…a single friend, my world.” Leo Buscaglia
Joni Mitchell sings “You don’t know what you’ve got till it’s gone.” But I knew every day what an amazing friend I had in Georgena Grace. She was compassionate and kind, funny and thoughtful, caring and generous. And oh, how she loved flowers!
Her life was the epitome of service. She went out of her way to lend a hand, always willing to step up when needed and when she smiled her brilliant smile, you felt loved and appreciated.
As a trauma specialist and grief guide, Gerogena held our hands as we moved through our grief process. She guided us through the rocky terrain as we tried to make sense out of losing a loved one and showed us how to find solid footing so we could move forward on our sacred journey. She was a loving mother, an awesome sister, an amazing friend, a loyal confidant—these are just a few of the roles she held in the world. The world is left a better place because she was here.
Life is so short. We are here for just a brief time on this planet, to explore and learn and remember who we are as spiritual beings. And when we’ve completed our journey, Spirit calls us home.
How do those of us left on the planet cope with the loss of a loved one? I turned to Georgena’s book, A New Mourning: Discovering our Gifts in Grief for answers. Her wisdom is to practice self-care. “This self-care thing is a lifelong, moment-by-moment process that I have said yes to….”What is the most kind and loving thing I can be, do, or have of myself in this moment? A cup of tea? A glass of water with a pinch of sea salt and lemon? A walk outside to feel my bare feet with their 1,300 nerve endings per square inch, connect with the grass, the dirt, the sand? One minute of peace and quiet as I turn away from the computer and stretch? Telling my story to a trusted colleague or family member? Being grateful for what I am doing, where I am or something beautiful right in front of me?” Wise words and practices for us to embody.
Georgena is now the energy and vibration of love. While we cannot hug her or call her on the phone, she lives in our hearts. You might even hear her whisper to you in the night, “God’s got this.”
God Bless You Georgena. Thank you for your grace.
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There will be a Celebration of Life Service for Georgena on October 28 at 1:30 pm at The Aerie at Eagle Landing located at 10220 SE Causey Ave, Happy Valley, OR. The ceremony will be live-streamed then re-posted at a later date.
A memorial fund has been established to help cover the service and end of life expenses. Payments can be made to: The Georgena Grace Celebration of Life Fund, PMB #734, 5331 S Macadam St, Ste 258, Portland, OR 97239. For online donations, inquire with the subject line “Donation” to her email, georgena@georgenagrace.com
For more details, follow her Georgena Eggleston blog on Caring Bridge.
“Everything you judge you fear. Think about it. Ask yourself what you judge, and then ask yourself why you fear, and you will know this in your heart once and for all.” Paul Selig, Book of Love and Creation
It is very popular to play the blame game in today’s society. We often look a scapegoat, someone to blame for the problems of the world. We blame the government, stock market, banks, wealthy people, poor people, big business, other countries and our parents for the pain and suffering of today’s world. We point fingers and worry about what others are doing or not doing. When we do that, we are simply spreading fear.
It’s so easy to judge what others are doing and give advice to how they should change their behavior. Actually it is a way to avoid looking at our own limiting beliefs and fear-based thoughts. An important step on our spiritual journey is to take responsibility and pay attention to what we are doing, thinking and saying.
Responsibility is not about blaming ourselves. Responsibility is the ability to respond. It is the freedom to take action. It is the power to change. When we take responsibility, we face our fears and take steps to move past them.
Practice looking at what you want instead of what you don’t want. Ask each day “What is mine to do to make the world a better place?” Release judgment and anger and send love instead. When we send love we raise the vibration for everyone.
Be gentle. Practice compassion. Having compassion for ourselves and others opens us to love and be loved. Compassion awakens love in us. Love is the healing power beyond judgment and blame. There is always a choice.
Speak this prayer attunement aloud whenever you are feeling separate, angry, or judgmental. Speak it aloud for yourself when you are feeling fearful.
I don’t know about you, but this holiday season has felt like a rollercoaster of emotions. Lofty highs and rock-bottom lows and depleting energy in-between. I found myself feeling blue for no real reason or feeling lonely with plenty of people around. I feel like I have a label on my forehead that reads — Fragile: Handle with Care.
We are all a bit fragile during the holidays. There are expectations, demands, promises, hopes, fears, worries, and grief all swirling together. We have our own personal challenges to deal with as well as feeling the pain of humanity’s injustices.
Here is my simple practice to bring me back to balance.
• Breathe and remember the gift of life.
• Be mindful and acknowledge how I am feeling.
• Be grateful for all the blessings in my life.
• Love myself first and extend that love to others.
• Speak with loving kindness.
Here is a prayer that brings me back to Love:
I am grateful for this new day. I embrace this day knowing God is revealed as the radiant, energizing, joy-filled presence of Love. I know Love moves into the very cells of my being bringing light, harmony, and peace. I accept guidance to willingly let go of any resentment, hurt or disappointment. I invite the healing presence of Love to wash away any pain or darkness. I enter this day with a grateful heart and receive all the blessings Love has in store for me. And so it is. Amen.
Regardless of emotions or appearances in your life, please know that you are loved and appreciated.
May the light of the season guide your days with wisdom, fill your heart with joy and surround you with the presence of love.
I don’t know about you, but this holiday season has felt like a rollercoaster of emotions. Lofty highs and rock-bottom lows and depleting energy in-between. I found myself feeling blue for no real reason or feeling lonely with plenty of people around. I feel like I have a label on my forehead that reads — Fragile: Handle with Care.
We are all a bit fragile during the holidays. There are expectations, demands, promises, hopes, fears, worries, and grief all swirling together. We have our own personal challenges to deal with as well as feeling the pain of humanity’s injustices.
Here is my simple practice to bring me back to balance.
• Breathe and remember the gift of life.
• Be mindful and acknowledge how I am feeling.
• Be grateful for all the blessings in my life.
• Love myself first and extend that love to others.
• Speak with loving kindness.
Here is a prayer that brings me back to Love:
I am grateful for this new day. I embrace this day knowing God is revealed as the radiant, energizing, joy-filled presence of Love. I know Love moves into the very cells of my being bringing light, harmony, and peace. I accept guidance to willingly let go of any resentment, hurt or disappointment. I invite the healing presence of Love to wash away any pain or darkness. I enter this day with a grateful heart and receive all the blessings Love has in store for me. And so it is. Amen.
Regardless of emotions or appearances in your life, please know that you are loved and appreciated.
May the light of the season guide your days with wisdom, fill your heart with joy and surround you with the presence of love.
